Club Totti

THE GIRL next door will always hold a special in my heart, we grew up together, went down to the canal and caught tadpoles together. Sometimes they grew legs and hopped away. Sometimes the cat ate them. Then one day I looked at her and she was different. She’d grown up. So had I. I knew this because something in my trousers told me so.

So I’d go of and play football with the guys. We’d walk past the laundromat on the way back. Quite often they’d be in there, chatting. They’d giggle as we walked past but if I went in and said hello she’d turn red and look at her feet.

She was changing, she had tits now. I knew all about tits, I’d seen them in a magazine. I really wanted to see hers. They weren’t as big as the ones in the magazine but I didn’t care. I wanted to feel them on the palm of my hand.

I used to get hard-ons in class from thinking about her. Exams were the worst, she was always there, naked in my mind. I’d never actually seen her naked though, it was just her face on the bodies of magazine girls.

I turned 18 that winter, she the following spring. Then the summer came, the exams were over. She came round to my house for the first time in years, she came to tell me she’d be going to university in the Autumn. She was going up north. I’d be heading south.

“We haven’t been down to the old railway by the canal for ages,” she said.

“Do you want to to go now?” I asked. We talked a lot on the way, we sounded like grown ups. When we got there she said she had something in her eye, I leaned forward to have a look …

Anybody who remebers my previous post on the mathematics of sex will already know that joining in the fun with all three of these girls would be nine times better than if you were to restrict yourself to just one of them.

Watching this little masturbation orgy might help you get the idea. It really made me want to dive down in there and help them out.

This was e-mailed to me today so may have already seen it circulating the internet, if so then just concentrate on the free galleries. Otherwise hats off and thumbs up to the authors, whoever they may be.

Man Laws
The Twenty-Five Rules of Manhood

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss’s car.
(d) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy’s fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

6: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy’s birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy’s choice.

7: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

8: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who’s playing.

9: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you’re sunning on a tropical beach .. and it’s delivered by a topless model and only when it’s free.

10: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

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Orina

Rudy

Ulya

Redheads come in a wide variety of shades. From the flirty, brightly burning strawberry blondes to the deep, smouldering auburn. I love them all … Are you surprised?

What all redheads seem to have in common is a fire that constantly burns within. The ones I have known were all a bit posessive and jealous but they would reward fidelity with some real smokin’ sex. Unfortunately I’m just not a fidelity kind of guy and believe me, they can be just as passionate about throwing bound copies of War and Peace at your head.

But it’s all worth it. Making love to a hot redhead is something I would happily endure a few bruises for. Wouldn’t you?

You can read more of my sexual shenanigans at Seymour Totti’s Foriegn Policy and The World of Suzie Wong

And don’t forget to visit my porn collections at Asian Floozie